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CAR INSURANCE
Not enough value
Helen's old Chevrolet was written off and the insurance company offered her $5000
Helen screamed at the assessor saying " The car was valued at more than that."
The assessor explained that they evaluate the insured item and the price offered was
sufficient to provide a replacement car of similar quality -
Well said Susan . . . " You had better cancel the policy I have on my Husband."
Carolina Insurance Policies
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Actual statements found on insurance forms
* Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
* The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
* I thought the window was down, but I found out it was up, when I put my head through it.
* I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
* A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
* A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
* The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
* I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.
* In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
* I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my
vision and I did not see the other car.
* I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
* I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
* As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable
to stop in time to avoid the accident.
* To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.
* My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
* An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
* I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull.
* I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.
* The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.
* I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car.
* The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
* I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.
* The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way, when it struck the front end.
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